What is the biggest problem that I have worked in on is what he says whenever we have an argument. He insists that we should not be discussing anything that he had done in the past. He always says that from this point on I should just look in the future, not in the past. What he doesn’t understand is that this theory does not work and this sort of an engine that we started riding 30 years ago is broken and he still refuses to see what broke it or even tried to work on fixing it. He simply does not acknowledge he’s done anything wrong and therefore, in his mind, there is nothing to work on or fix. How can I keep going knowing that all I judge him on is his past dealings and all he says, is that he’s going to look in the future and don’t want to pay attention to the past. How could it be possible to look in the future when while 30 years of repeated behavior has brought us to the point of brink? I used to think he is so dumb for believing this, but now I think he’s been the genius, and I’ve been the dumb one who’s fallen for his hoax all these years.

For the last 30 years he’s yelled at me, screamed at me, controlled me, took away everything from me, talk badly about me, went to his family in and said awful things about me, created friends at isolated me, and I know deep in my heart that he truly hates me. All this and when I finally filed for divorce he is saying that I should not look at the past, instead, we should at the future.